Been There Done That
by Liebling
Summary: CHAPTER THIRTEEN! WOW! Sequel to Chasing Mr. Wood. Katie's POV. Similar to the book Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging. In hot pursuit of Mr.Wood
1. Nuns and Ugly Clothes

Authors Note: Okay, you guys get to hear my rambling again enjoy it! I am so pleased with the ending reviews. Especially considering my famous "It was HECK to end" speech, and it was and I don't particularly like the ending myself! You guys really rock, I wanted 200, I got 200! Thanks, SO much; you don't know how awesome this is for me. I mean after having about thirty billion unsuccessful (but solid) fics, I finally struck gold! I hope you all had a great New Year's Happy 2003! I know, its taken ages (and I feel horrible) so now I am NOT going to have an after school snack until I get this done. And yes, I am hungry. I want a Dr. Pepper! Lol. I'm not sure about this title yet, but I'll think of something =) I have to write this over though, because I made like a Christmas sort of beginning and quite obviously it's way too late! That's what I get for not updating soon enough. I hope it was worth the wait! Forgive me if this isn't hilarious it'll take me a few chapters to get used to updating, being silly, and being random.  
  
Becky: I hope the sequel is just as good too. I dearly hope! Nah, my reviewers are the best of the best.  
  
Riposte: Alrighty, how many times do I need to thank you? You reviewed like tons of times to get me to 200! Thanks so much! Haha Oliver's a loser; I don't really care about him, at all! I know, Parvati annoys me too, but there you have it.  
  
Rachie: This is as fast as I can update!  
  
Crystal Queen: I know! But George and Katie are cute together, and maybe I can work Oliver in the mix some way.  
  
HP Fan Forever: He's still a cutie, Oliver that is. I'm so nervous about doing a sequel!  
  
Lemon the Kitty: Thanks for putting me on your favorites, and thanks for reviewing you hyper hyper person! =)  
  
Orio Cookie: SEQUEL!  
  
Something-Corporate: Don't be sad GET GLAD!  
  
Dana: Wow. I think you're obsessed! Forgive me for making you wait so long but I've been very careful about trying not to publish last-minute junk, thus I haven't rushed myself.  
  
Smiley Girl: The best fic you've ever read? Thanks, *so* much, that means a lot because I know I've read tons of great ones! Check my favorites.  
  
Child of the Moon: Thanks =)  
  
Melli: I'll e-mail you. Hehe. Thanks for your review!  
  
Allie-Marina Lacross- It can't "fully" be over because here, hark! We've got a sequel!  
  
-Sorry if I forgot anyone. All reviews are greatly appreciated-  
  
~*Been There Done That*~  
  
12 AM:  
  
Falalalala. It's late. GUESS WHAT I GOT FOR the candycane holiday? An adorable plaid journal (not unlike my first one) from George woo wooo. Never underestimate the stupidity, and sweetness of men.  
  
Unless your boyfriend is obsessed with putting macaroni and cheese over his eyes and claiming to be "Noodle man."  
  
Or unless your boyfriend spits milk out his nose.  
  
Other then that, the above rings true.  
  
Alicia got this stuffed toy hot dog. She was beside herself in glee. "Marcus, it doesn't have any ketchup on it." Marcus looked at her oddly. "Or relish." She stated again. "Or mustard." Before she could ramble off even more hotdog condiments Marcus snogged her senseless. I ran out of the room and as I ran I heard. "It doesn't have mustard either Marcus."  
  
Yuck yuck yuck!  
  
Forgive me while I HURL.  
  
1:34 AM:  
  
Can't sleep. Potion's tomorrow. Need-a-caffeine-jolt.  
  
3:56 AM:  
  
Butterbeer will do just fine =) Hahaha. Yes. That's a "jolt" for sure. Susan who for some odd reason was snogging Gary in the Gryffindor common room (don't ask) looked at me and said: "Katie, dearest it's too early for whisky."  
  
I would've reminded her that I don't enjoy cold, hard liquor. Unless it's Gin, or whisky, or Jack Daniel's-  
  
Oh heck I love it all!  
  
Anyway, I was going to remind her it was butterbeer (and legal for that matter) but she just shot me an evil look and said: "Can you seem, I'm like busy?"  
  
Potion's tomorrow.  
  
How ew is that?  
  
7:49 AM:  
  
I get to see my boyfriend this morning! George! Woo Wooo.  
  
3 Life  
  
8:39 AM:  
  
I'm at breakfast, I thought I was eating lemons but they ended up being cubes of butter.  
  
What a wakeup call.  
  
"Mmm lemon, citrus-y.."  
  
And then pah pow! The buttery nasty taste comes on.  
  
I screamed *yes really* and I spit it up in this sort of yellowy liquid. Very nasty.  
  
This gave the Gryffindors quite a shock.  
  
Nickela just looked at me and said: "Like totally, what a nasty nail polish colour that would be." And then she looked at it with disgust and started feeding blueberries to Oliver.  
  
Alicia was too preoccupied with her little life over at the nasty, rude, I mean SLYTHERIN house table she didn't even see me. Some friend she is.  
  
George looked sympathetic to my nasty butter issue. He started to lick it off my plate.  
  
Wow.  
  
Psycho's, honestly.  
  
Oliver smiled and said: "Whew Kates, are you going to toss your flippers now?"  
  
What in the bloody world are we coming to?  
  
-=Leaving for Potion's=-  
  
12:30 PM:  
  
Lunch.  
  
Boring.  
  
Mmmmm  
  
JELLY AND JAM! And George. and his hot little brother.  
  
12:39 PM:  
  
All right, that was just plain wrong.  
  
12:45 PM:  
  
Wrong yet true.  
  
1:00 PM:  
  
Oh yes, did I tell you I have gotten new school uniforms?  
  
1:56 PM:  
  
Compliments of Mum and Dad  
  
Issue is they're very ugly.  
  
Extraordinarily ugly.  
  
Gray skirt (that goes down to my knees and won't roll um, pleated)  
  
A black, BORING robe.  
  
And a very boring white blouse.  
  
2:45 PM:  
  
Alrighty now, I am not some immodest person (believe me) actually far from it. But c'mon on now do I look like a stinkin nun? No offense to religious people or anything, but honestly.  
  
Mum's note was "I know that fashions are mini skirts, and tattoos but we have raised a classy daughter."  
  
You know what's hilarious?  
  
Is when  
  
A) Parents think they know everything and they try to test their little "kid skills" on you. They always fail.  
  
B) When they try to act "oh so cool" by saying things such as "Oh yeah Homie daughter how was your day? Would you like to have some candy? And it is NOT the sugar free kind either. Oh no, we're going out on a limb right now, it's crazy it's psycho it isn't sugar free, it has sugar!"  
  
C) When they give you silly talks such as, "We trust you, you would never get in trouble, not do your homework or eat your cake before your dinner right?" And you go "Course not I'm the good child look at him!* (Innocently point to younger sibling)  
  
D) When they know you so well that you can't help but love their uncool behavior. And believe me, there's a heck of a lot of it. Or when they do something really cool, like when my Mum told me during primary school we could 'ditch' and go to the cinema and see that high rated movie. Or when my Dad took me to a Quidditch game and bought me all the snacks and toys I wanted.....  
  
Yeah...  
  
5:23 PM:  
  
I can't stand hairspray. Do you know that? It looks, horrid. It has that really nasty citrus smell that reminds me of the whole lemon/butter issue.  
  
And it makes it stick to my head.  
  
6:12 PM:  
  
I look extremely nun-ish, my hair has no body it's like flat on my face.  
  
Never get fashion tips from Alicia ever, ever again.  
  
9:52 PM:  
  
I went into the common room, and Oliver tried to snog me! How sick is that? Nickela was busy "touching up her makeup." First of all, I don't even know anyone (including desperate bogey boy, Mark) who would want to snog me looking like I do now.  
  
Not as though I didn't want to totally annoy Nickela. Cause I did.  
  
However, yuck! So I had to stand up from the couch, and I covered up my peachy flavoured lips.  
  
And then I said: "You had your chance at this buddy." Hahaha me in my nun outfit saying that was just rotten hilarious.  
  
Oliver looked.  
  
And then I said: "Been there done that."  
  
And walked upstairs.  
  
Good thing he didn't get to my lips before I realized what he was trying to do.  
  
11:22 PM:  
  
Was going to talk to Bran only to find him and Gryffindor girl snogging like there was no tomorrow.  
  
Good for him, in a sick and twisted sort of way.  
  
She looked all embarrassed, squealed and as I said my goodbyes (not to mention my apologizes and vows to knock next time) she was touching up on her lipgloss.  
  
I saw Bran smile at her and whisper: "I like the cherry one."  
  
My Merlin.  
  
I feel like I'm going to hurl, and it hasn't been the first time today. 


	2. Lemon Drops, Voldemort, and Percy

Authors Note: Finals are next week (they really are midterms but we called our halfway through the semester stuff midterms so you know) and I'm nervous! Everything's like 20% of our grade! All this emphasis on college about makes me ready to puke. Three day weekend! Woo Woo. Oh yeah, you guys can check out my updated bio.  
  
-Good Charlotte Rocks-  
  
Professor Weasley: I'm glad you love it so soon! I know, it ticks me off when people of hundreds of reviews never update. It's like, c'mon now!  
  
Rachie: Of course!  
  
Lemon the Kitty: Hyper? You are ALWAYS hyper. Yum, lint.  
  
Melli: Glad you think so =)  
  
Orio Cookie: Heck yeah!  
  
Crystal Queen: Thanks bunches!  
  
Evol Norgara: Exactly, nuns can't get married. Poor souls. But they are awesome I am Catholic *thus we have nuns* and you know I don't want to come off of anti-religion. Cause I'm not! I'm in favor or any and every religion.  
  
Hp Fan Forever: As good as ever? Aww thanks so much.  
  
Allie-Marina LaCross: Yup, a nun joke. But nuns rock nonetheless.  
  
All reviews are greatly appreciated.  
  
~*Been There Done That*~  
  
8:49 AM:  
  
Just got back from brekkie.  
  
George was flinging syrup at Fred.  
  
The maturity of guys is amazing.  
  
Fred, in return was throwing cubes of butter at George.  
  
Ron (George's hot little brother) was throwing waffle at both of them.  
  
Percy (Mister. Evil) was docking points whilst ducking under the table screaming: "Not today, I'm too young to die!"  
  
He is a perfect example about power, the poor kid's bloody obsessed with power.  
  
-And Penelope.  
  
He's obsessed with her too. And I've found out he has this odd little obsession with donuts.  
  
I relate this to Alicia and hotdogs.  
  
11:09 AM:  
  
Finished with Potion's (woo woo) Alicia was obsessed with Snape today. It was really freaky.  
  
She was like "Hey Kates, don't you think Snape washed his hair today? It almost looked-pretty."  
  
Pretty? Get ova yourself!  
  
12:23 PM:  
  
Snogged with George during lunch (this is a very good way to spend time, however I could've done Charms homework)  
  
But it all comes down to:  
  
Who really cares about Charms?  
  
Come on now.  
  
12:29 PM:  
  
Yeah, yeah, rave on.  
  
Oh yes, did I tell you about Alicia and Reeyco (Sorry that's just the name that comes to mind when I think of Marcus)?  
  
Well, for one I caught them eating hotdogs together at lunch. Which was hilarious, he was feeding her spoonfuls of relish.  
  
I'm sure it was plain delightful.  
  
4:59 PM:  
  
Has been a very uneventful day thus far. Only halfway interesting points were when George stuck noodles up his nose, put on Draco Malfoy's Slytherin cape and pretended he was Voldermort.  
  
Yes, yes, this was rather humorous.  
  
Oh yes and Alicia started screaming (what a L-O-S-E-R) and Marcus picked her up and heaved her onto his shoulders and ran her outside of the Great Hall!  
  
Percy said this was "not orderly" and Hermione (also known as ugly skirt girl) started rolling her eyes and saying:  
  
"Honestly you cretins, it's George."  
  
No one believed her though.  
  
No one ever believes the smart ones though.  
  
Oh I was cracking up SOOO much.  
  
And I got to eat tons of candy (complements of George's obsession with Honeydukes.)  
  
7:21 AM:  
  
I have to wear my ugly robes and skirt today. This is disappointing yet enlightening.  
  
After all, I can see if people like me for more then looks.  
  
Wait, I've never had looks to begin with. Even if I wore those slimming robes.  
  
Point taken.  
  
8:52 AM:  
  
Dumbledore strikes again!  
  
Joy to the world.  
  
During breakfast today he announces there is to be a display of all his lemon drops.  
  
Fun.  
  
He tells us that they are "different" yet "united"  
  
What in the world?  
  
And it's mandatory.  
  
And it's a lemon drop museum.  
  
And George looks practically giddy with excitement and longing to see random kinds of lemon drops. 


	3. Orange Lemon Drops? And the Freak Show

Authors Note: I couldn't leave you guys hanging with the whole lemon drop museum thing!  
  
HPFanForever: Oh gosh, I love Dumbledore everything about him screams "psycho" which is cool though. Hehe.   
  
Silver: Ah, I love George and his odd antics.  
  
Orio Cookie: If Wood chokes on them, good ridden!   
  
Lemon The Kitty: Alrighty then..  
  
Crystal Queen: Maybe Oliver will be in this chapter! (Evil glint) Thanks so much!  
  
All reviews are greatly appreciated.  
  
~*Been There Done That*~  
  
9:12 AM:  
  
The lemon drop museum is scheduled to open at 4:30 PM; at least I get out of Potion's! Score.  
  
George is so excited and cheery "I wonder if they will have an orange flavored lemon drop." He actually said that!  
  
Weirdo.  
  
Alicia is whining about how they should display different mustard flavors. Is there any other possible flavors for "mustard?" I didn't think so.  
  
Bran and resident Gryffindor psycho are practically beside themselves with glee. Bran especially they are planning to "sneak off to under the three thousand year old lemon drop table and snog." And that's a direct quote mind you.  
  
I'll get back to you later, with any new news I have to go to Charms now.  
  
Lates.  
  
12:21 PM:  
  
Marcus Flint is hanging out with Alicia, Me, and George. This is supposed to be "fun" yet it isn't.  
  
He is telling us the entire story about how his Mum makes the best turkey gravy; she even adds little bits of sausage in it.  
  
He promises that once Alicia and him get married Alicia must learn how to make it.  
  
As well as their heirs.  
  
Glory.  
  
4:23 PM:  
  
Reporting to the dungeon for Lemon Drop Museum.  
  
4:30 PM:  
  
Waiting for Snape to lead us down to the Great Hall.  
  
George is jumping up and down in excitement (he seems to think this is going to be amazing and enlightening)  
  
Snape is sneering unpleasantly complaining about what a waste of classroom time this is going to be.  
  
Sadly, I almost agree.  
  
6:23 PM:  
  
Back and in comfy home (dormitory.) That was very odd indeed. Well, Snape walked us down to the Great Hall and there were like thirty gazillion tables all filled with lemon drops!  
  
So, we walked around to all the tables (we didn't get samples because Dumbledore claimed this was one of his 'private collections') I wanted a bloody sample!  
  
Cheap school!  
  
We were there for about an hour, and then went back to Potions! Which stunk.  
  
Bored.  
  
8:34 AM:  
  
I get a cinnamon bagel! Go me! Woo wooo wooo  
  
C'mon now!  
  
Katie's in control!  
  
-=Psycho moment=-  
  
George, Me, Fred, Parvati (Ew!), Alicia, Marcus, Bran, and Gryffindor girl, as well as Nickela and Oliver are all going to Hogsmeade today.  
  
Together.  
  
Look out ladies and gents this'll be an amazing time of, bonding, and friendly behavior.  
  
Yeah right!  
  
Let the hair pulling begin.  
  
10:42 AM:  
  
I'm in The Three Broomsticks right now.  
  
Nickela is filing her nails. She says that they are "very sharp." And then kiddingly she said, "As if to scratch you with my dear" to me.  
  
((Creeped out))  
  
Marcus totally doesn't fit in. He bought us all a round of butter beers, Alicia says he is just like "Saint Nick" (kind and prosperous "") however, no one likes him any better. I mean c'mon now, he's a Slytherin.  
  
He asked Nickela if he could borrow her nail filer so he could sharpen his teeth, and make them like vampire-y and pointy.  
  
Oooh Merlin.  
  
Bran's girlfriend is a loony. 'Least she's nice though, I mean when she talks she sounds nice.  
  
Sadly, she hasn't been talking much. Her lips have been attached to Bran's and only little "eeps" have been heard.  
  
Parvati and Fred are livin' it up (in this case it means chugging butter beer as if there is no tomorrow.)  
  
Oliver looks pretty bored and or wanting to snog (me?)  
  
And George and I are partly normal. Minus the fact that I'm being a recluse and he's been in the loo for more than thirty minutes.  
  
Wow. No one's normal.  
  
The Freak Show is now moving on to Honeydukes.  
  
And they are moving without me!  
  
Wait, you just can't have a Freak Show without me.  
  
I mean, come on now.  
  
HEAD FREAK RIGHT HERE! 


	4. The Things Guys Say Wrong

"My" note: Hey, I'm sorry (I know it has been ages)  
  
Allie-Marina Lacross: Erm, thank you?  
  
Crazygurlhyper13: Laugh laugh laugh!  
  
Quicksilver Fallen: Hullo to you too! But the issue is if Marcus had his teeth fixed he wouldn't be funny anymore. Rationally.  
  
Riposte: Your back! Erlack, I can't stand Nickela.  
  
Lord of the Snitch48: I shall.  
  
HPFanForever: I know! Poor actor Marcus. He must be having issues at school, I bet the kids make fun of him! I mean, I would.  
  
"Hahaha squirrel teeth!" Or something like that.  
  
Melli: Finals were super hard!  
  
Dana: You reviewed thrice times! My goody gosh! I am SO excited about #5 coming out!  
  
Evol Norgara: Orange lemon drops! My little invention.  
  
Orange  
  
Torange?  
  
Lemon the kitty: I love cinnamon and raisin bagels! The best, ever!  
  
Michelle-Belly: I have no clue why people find that so hilarious! But what can I say? And then people start quoting it ::sigh:: it really is funny when people actually start to quote you!  
  
Professor Weasley: Thanks! Sorry it's been a while since I last posted.  
  
Silver: I got quoted. Again!  
  
=-And thank you to all of you who have reviewed Chasing Mr. Wood recently, and if you haven't, read it!-=  
  
All reviews are greatly appreciated. This is a short chapter, I know. But I like it!  
  
~*Been There Done That*~  
  
3:34 PM:  
  
Back from Hogsmeade, finally! I spent WAYYYY too much time with those psychos.  
  
Well, here's what happened for the rest of the time there. That is after I wrote at the beginning of the 'trip.'  
  
For one, Nickela and Parvati made fast friends. Very fast friends.  
  
Right after Nickela told Parvati that she loved cherry lipgloss Parvati was sold, "Oh wow, we are going to become great friends, probably best friends I love cherry lipgloss! The scent, the smell, the fragrance!"  
  
Minus the fact Parvati is already best friends with Lollypop Lavender.  
  
Now not enough time to go into details but this is how it all ended:  
  
Marcus & Alicia: Eating an icecream. Nasty part being that like the whole cone got stuck in Marcus's front tooth and Alicia had to pull it out, it took her AGES.  
  
Bran & his girlfriend: Skipping around Hogsmeade singing "It's a wonderful life!"  
  
Parvati & Fred: Snogging in a trashcan. Classy. Very Parvati like, really.  
  
Nickela & Oliver: Drowning their relationship issues in butter beer.  
  
George & I: Well, I was sitting on a bench eating ice cream, and George was talking to Fred as Fred was snogging Parvati in a trash can.  
  
I felt v. single. Nicely single. So nice I think I just could've snogged Oliver Wood very passionately that very moment.  
  
So single I think I ought to stay inside my dormitory and not go out tonight.  
  
8:44 PM:  
  
Ran into Malfoy. Just as I'm feeling "very single." Do you know what happened? I literally RAN into him. Yes, into him and his gorgeousness. I mean, sure he's a Slytherin (a bloody Slytherin) but he's still adorable. That smirk, to die for.  
  
Sugar pie honeybuns!  
  
But, I am not single (contrary to how I feel) and I have a boyfriend. Yes, I really have a boyfriend can you believe that? Someone ACTUALLY likes me! Fascinating.  
  
Good, I think I needed an ego boost today.  
  
Just looked at big ears. Ego is suffering. Greatly.  
  
9:51 PM:  
  
Saw George. He said I was "looking like a flamingo" why thank you! I love when guys' just build you up. Instead of saying I looked radiant he said I looked like a flamingo.  
  
Oh Merlin, maybe I shouldn't have put on so much blush?  
  
No, blush looks good.  
  
Feet look bad. Do flamingo's have big feet?  
  
Merlin! They have big beaks. I always knew I had a big nose.  
  
Planning on bringing this up to George.  
  
11:02 PM:  
  
Talked to George.  
  
"No shnookums you do not look like a flamingo, I don't know what I was thinking when I said that! It must have been after I drank that butter beer, and snogged Parvati-"  
  
What in the bloody world?  
  
I brought up how...wrong that was to George. He gave me an odd look, "Don't worry about it donut."  
  
Is he saying I eat too much?  
  
Do I eat too much?  
  
12:23 AM:  
  
Well sorry I'm not Miss 90-pound Parvati.  
  
Big girls need lovin' too!  
  
Oh Merlin, I'm starting to sound like some messed up actress.  
  
1:58 AM:  
  
State: Alive. Sadly.  
  
2:34 AM:  
  
Well get over this.  
  
Eventually.  
  
Yum cake!  
  
Chocolate cake!  
  
Resist!  
  
Yes, resist!  
  
Impossible to resist. Its charm, and fragrance, and brown frosting with sprinkles.  
  
Eating.  
  
3:12 AM:  
  
Going to talk to Bran because, well, I'm having cake issues.  
  
5:56 AM:  
  
I've been up ALL night! I talked to Bran; he tells me he sees no resemblance to me being a flamingo.  
  
However, he sees resemblance to me being an elephant. And I feel OH so much better.  
  
He says I don't look like a donut; I look like a pot roast.  
  
Boys are such sweethearts, aren't they?  
  
***  
  
*** 


	5. Donuts, Pencils, and Chicken

Authors Note: Lalala. You know what I love? Cookie dough ice cream!  
  
Allie-Marina LaCross: I know! Parvati is so, ew!  
  
Evol Norgara: Torange isn't a word, silly. Yes, a very big trash can with ham sandwiches inside.  
  
Professor Weasley: Sawwy! I know it wasn't as funny as the previous one's, but you know what can you do? Sometimes it strikes sometimes it doesn't.  
  
Oh yes, and I recommend everyone to read **It All Started With A Compliment** it's my newest one chapter story. Forgive the annoying (and always there) errors.  
  
http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=1228767  
  
Summary of It All Started With A Compliment:  
  
**The coming and the downfall of Fleur, in her own words. What happens when looks, attention, temptation compliments and the willingness to please consumes you? Corruption. This is the story of Fleur, and her life wasn't always as pretty as her face.**  
  
  
  
Rexy: One of my new reviewers! Thanks so much! I know, Sean is hot isn't he?  
  
Lemon The Kitty: Cherries! I want a cherry purse so bad.  
  
Orio Cookie: I think I'm falling in love with Bran!  
  
AngelD: Another one of my new reviewers! I think. I know guys are as blond as Anna Nichol Smith. Honestly!  
  
Silver: Sorry about your old review. Exactly! I wish I had a cute and sweet guy friend. *mutter*  
  
Crystal Queen: I'll *never* stop this story! Rest assured.  
  
Quicksilver Fallen: Cake rocks, especially marble cake with cream cheese frosting.  
  
"It's a black fly in your chardonnay-"-Alanis Morissette, "Ironic" luv that song!  
  
  
  
~*Been There Done That*~  
  
6:21 AM:  
  
Boys are so annoying! You know, I think it'd be pretty funny if we put them all on a remote island, and then they all became cannibals and only the best men survived. Then us ladies would actually get halfway decent men!  
  
Ah, a girl can dream can't she?  
  
7:34 AM:  
  
I haven't slept all night! Fancy that! I kept thinking about myself as a flamingo and as a pot roast and my Merlin it's disturbing.  
  
Like, my mind was having a movie. And in this movie, I was a flamingo.  
  
A happy pretty, *pink* flamingo with a big beak, but that's beside the point. So I was traipsing about in the woods, when all of a sudden a pot roast came out of the bushes, and it started screaming at me.  
  
But I was the pot roast! I was two people/animals/things at once!  
  
And then, George (with no shirt on, and a spear in one hand) came out of a farm house and savagely ate the pot roast (which was a screaming me.)  
  
And he also tried to make a move and spear me (as a flamingo) but of course, I began to run.  
  
Until my GIANT foot/paw/leg thingy got stuck in a log.  
  
Now, how sick is that?  
  
George as a caveman is really scary. But what if he was wearing a loincloth?  
  
8:41 AM:  
  
I'm eating breakfast right now! I'm having a glass of OJ right now, and by OJ I do not mean Orville Jinkinson (a very scary bloke who eats his bogeys) ewwww!  
  
I'm losing my appetite!  
  
But, then I see the sprinkle donut...  
  
Nevermind.  
  
Still very hungry.  
  
Very hungry. So hungry perhaps I could eat George's donut.  
  
Oh nevermind, we won't eat donuts we'll just snog.  
  
But donuts are better than snogging.  
  
Sprinkled donuts.  
  
Chocolate.  
  
George. Lips.  
  
9:14 AM:  
  
Decided on donut.  
  
Could not pass it up.  
  
Was v. great deal.  
  
Not very low calories.  
  
Shall snog and make up for gained calories.  
  
10:11 AM:  
  
Why must Charms be so boring? Flickwick is so short, I mean he might as well be a dwarf. Or my little brother.  
  
I'd snog him though.  
  
12:48 PM:  
  
Lunch is delish! Let me take out some time, so I can tell you about my ugly combination of clothes today.  
  
Grey pleated skirt. Very modest and dumb like.  
  
I mean I'm not saying dumb=modest I'm saying modest=dumb, wait same thing right? Oh forget it.  
  
White oxford button up shirt. Tucked in. My skirt is pulled up past my belly button! How sad is that!  
  
It is masking my beautiful belly button ring. Not that I have one. And not that my belly is beautiful. But if I had a belly button ring, then-  
  
Mary Jane shoes.  
  
These are very like, secondary school shoes.  
  
Knee socks.  
  
These are dumb and or boring. They keep falling down too.  
  
I'm missing out on my ham sandwich!  
  
I like MY PIG early in the morn!  
  
1:13 PM:  
  
How little happiness ends. Back in class. History of Magic.  
  
Did you know that Pringle (the girl) and Wrangle (the guy) were dwarves who were star-crossed lovers? Their families hated each other.  
  
That is just SO Romeo and Juliet.  
  
It was so-romantic.  
  
So romantic I wanted to take my dwarf boy and snog.  
  
So romantic I think I'll go eat another donut.  
  
2:32 PM:  
  
Alicia and Marcus are being very odd indeed. Alicia is actually acting SMART for a boy! She's always acting DUMB for one.  
  
Not as though she wasn't dumb to begin with, but you know, what can you do?  
  
I could restrain the amount of hotdogs she has, but that'd just be plain cruel.  
  
Marcus is very intelligent. I mean with those teeth, he'd have to be. I bet he uses his teeth as a pencil sharpener.  
  
How unfair is that to the rest of us?  
  
As we're taking a test, our pencil breaks. Evil Snape doesn't let us get up and sharpen it.  
  
But Marcus (being resourceful) gets to use his teeth.  
  
The failures of the public school system.  
  
Wait, I go to a private school.  
  
That's beside the point.  
  
4:44 PM:  
  
HAHA! It's 4:44! How silly is that! I like that time!  
  
Four!  
  
Four!  
  
Four!  
  
Ah. So, I saw Fred and Parvati in an empty corridor.  
  
I overheard/pretended to not hear them, heard Parvati say, "Don't you love the colour of my skirt Fred?"  
  
And he replied with, "It's gray. It's always been gray."  
  
With that she slapped him over the head and he said, "But this colour here is a very, lovely puke gray."  
  
Who's puke is gray?  
  
C'mon on now!  
  
How weird is that.  
  
5:12 PM:  
  
"I am one super special chicken leg."-Alicia  
  
"You're one special chicken wing!"-Marcus  
  
"A wing, why"  
  
"You fly through my heart, like a bird uses its wings to fly."-Marcus  
  
Alicia nodded, "I like oranges too."  
  
HOW SAD IS THAT?! My Merlin.  
  
That's about as sad as on a Valentine, "I choo choo choose you as my Valentine!" With the picture of a train on it.  
  
Corny!  
  
Yellow corn!  
  
6:49 PM:  
  
George's little brother Ron is so cute! But I saw him eating chicken and saying to himself, "This is great! Thank you chicken for what you have been doing for me, I mean I feel so healthy and special when I am eating you. Especially that juicy thigh section-"  
  
How weird is that?  
  
Does George have these weird chicken obsessions too?  
  
One can only hope he doesn't.  
  
  
  
***  
  
*** 


	6. The Gorgeous One

Authors Note: To all of my awesome reviewers, you guys rock my socks! Sorry for the short 'delay' it is due to my laziness and a small case of writer's block. By the way, eat buttered popcorn, chipsahoy cookies and listen to the band Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers!  
  
To my favorite people:  
  
Riposte: EVERYONE knows chicken rocks. Katie isn't fat! She just isn't ninety pounds, and she likes food, but who can blame her, really?  
  
Allie: Yes, Ron is psychotic everyone run for their lives!  
  
Evol Norgara: I love donuts.  
  
Orio Cookie: Thank you, thank you, I am still amazed people even find me partially funny.  
  
Heather: Although George did kiss Parvati he was mad-drunk so you can't really blame him now can you?  
  
Lord of the snitch 48: Thank you! Again, I am still amazed people find me even partially funny.  
  
Lemon the Kitty: Chicken! A club? Hm.  
  
Crystal Queen: Did you notice that in chapter two I believe Percy too had an obsession with donuts? And then there's Alicia and hotdogs, all of these people are obsessive freaks!  
  
Hannirose: Broke his nose, ouch.  
  
Quicksilver Fallen: Hysterics? Seriously?  
  
The Psychedelic Turtles: **My gosh** I am going to find an awful hard time living up to how great chapter five's reviews were!  
  
And to the rest of you people, I am dying for your reviews!  
  
All reviews are, as always, greatly appreciated.  
  
~*Been There Done That*~  
  
8:13 PM:  
  
And I just can't get enough of you baby just can't get enough!  
  
And I just can't get ennnnnoooooooouuuuuggggghhhhhh of:  
  
YOU!  
  
9:04 PM:  
  
I'm going to the kitchens. Need food. Need to see Dobby. Am beginning strange liking towards small cute creature.  
  
But Dobby is not cute-  
  
However, I hear (from Winky no doubt) that he is one great snogger.  
  
Shall try him and see.  
  
10:56 PM:  
  
Am in kitchens. Dobby brought me some 'skinned potatoes' to eat. Who wants skinned potatoes? Come on now! I like them with their skins still on! I do not like potatoes in the nude.  
  
Apparently, Dobby does.  
  
Did not snog Dobby.  
  
Found that could've been v. awkward  
  
Still v. curious nonetheless.  
  
Do love the little bloke, errr elf, errr creature.  
  
Eating.  
  
12:34 AM:  
  
Back in dormitory, am having "fun" as known as listening to gossip from Alicia and Nickela. Those two are so smart it's amazing.  
  
"Do Jewish people practice Judaism?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Wait aren't they the same things?"  
  
"No. Don't be dumb, Jewish people practice Catholicism."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"And what do Catholic people 'practice'?"  
  
"Judaism, like DUH."  
  
And that wasn't the worst of it, then they began talking about lip-gloss. For like the nth time.  
  
"I like the flavour pumpkin myself-"  
  
"What about hotdog?"  
  
"Are you out of your bloody mind?"  
  
"No, my mind is in my head thus I am not 'out of it'"  
  
"Well-"  
  
"Well what?"  
  
"Do they have hotdog lip gloss?"  
  
"If you want it to be so. If you want it to be so."  
  
Am v. disturbed. Especially after Alicia began speaking of Marcus.  
  
"I actually like his teeth, they remind me of a vampire's, and I, for one, find Dracula rather hot. But maybe that's just me-"  
  
His teeth look as though a bludger knocked them out.  
  
At least George has decent teeth, except when he puts in those rubber hillbilly teeth that I hate.  
  
He, to an extent makes hillbilly's look hot however.  
  
Am wondering what it is like to snog a hillbilly  
  
8:23 AM:  
  
I am at breakfast. Eating...chicken  
  
Do not like chicken very much after it became practically tasteless after George threw my chicken leg in maple syrup then said very loudly, "Look it's swimming, it's swimming."  
  
Am very amazed with his 'intelligence'  
  
9:41 AM:  
  
Do you know how boring History of Magic is?  
  
"And the house elf revolt of 1962-"  
  
Hermione, of course was thrilled. "WE SHALL BE FREE!"  
  
"You mean they?" Ronald Weasley inquired.  
  
And Hermione (ugly skirt girl, who doesn't even have the good grace to roll it up and make it look presentable, or to brush her tangly hair, and heck, maybe if she didn't slurp up the syrup on her plate she'd look better) simply said, "No, we."  
  
Then she said, "I believe we have all evolved from house elves."  
  
Oooooh my Merlin.  
  
I am in the land of freaks.  
  
These people are so psycho.  
  
10:29 AM:  
  
Am feeling very self-conscious now.  
  
Things wrong with me:  
  
-Could possibly have evolved from ugly house elf, and at one time ancestors may have looked like a female version of Dobby, this is disturbing in itself.  
  
-Have big ears. That, George calls "my little pompidoos"  
  
-Have big nose. Used to think I had nice nose until Parvati put a bracelet on it, and it just stayed there. Like bloody ring toss or something.  
  
-Feet don't look very good. They are v. ugly indeed.  
  
-Ugly school uniform.  
  
11:11 AM:  
  
Hermione says we should all be 'positive' (is positive thinking we evolved from that, thing also known as Dobby?) So, because I am incredibly bored, and have no life other than the sprinkled donut next to be I will write GOOD things about myself.  
  
-I like dinosaurs. Like. A lot.  
  
-I'm dating my soon to be (well, uh-) hubby George!  
  
-A donut is right in front of me  
  
-I am in perfect view of Ronald Weasley and his cute little freckled face.  
  
-No Hermione to be seen.  
  
-Ugly feet are covered up.  
  
There we have it folks.  
  
Oh yes I am also a prodigy.  
  
Well, a self-proclaimed one.  
  
1:34 PM:  
  
Am thinking about being self-proclaimed gorgeous one in which all must bow down to me.  
  
Have officially named self, "gorgeous one"  
  
Have made shrine to self.  
  
I now address myself as "gorgeous one" and tell others to do the same. Unless they want to be beat to death by my chicken (s).  
  
Yes, the "gorgeous one" has chickens who surround her "castle" (ugly dormitory) these chickens cluck.  
  
CLUCK.  
  
2:01 PM  
  
Feel v. special now.  
  
EGO BOOST!  
  
"Georgeous one." Get it, GEORGE? HAHA.  
  
No.  
  
"Gorgeous one"  
  
Oh yes.  
  
Have made self incredibly beautiful in order to fit new description of "gorgeous one" I actually put on some lip-gloss.  
  
This is, obviously an improvement.  
  
8:12 PM:  
  
"The people" are not accepting me as gorgeous as originally stated. Actually, no one even noticed. But then again, people always hate 'authority' and I so obviously am better than them. They are jealous of my beauty.  
  
Where's my chickens when I need them?  
  
CLUCK!  
  
I'm sure when George said, "Hey chicken thigh! Pass me the jelly!"  
  
He really meant, "Hey 'gorgeous one' you ready to snog?"  
  
Oh yeah.  
  
I'm sure of it.  
  
~*~*~* 


	7. Fruit Punch, WAIT, and Veela

Authors Note: To my lovely reviewers! You guys rock my socks! These reviews are overwhelming (seriously, I'm sitting her going 'how in the world' but ya know I love 'em!)  
  
Melli: Course I'm a girl! Bloody heck, I think in my author's note a few chapters back I was talking about how hot Sean Biggerstaff was. Goodness sake! I currently reside in California (woop woop) and I'm fourteen years old.  
  
Heather: Yes, Alicia and Nickela are odd. And dumb. Great combo.  
  
Riposte: You're seriously psychotic. Need I address more?  
  
Lord of the snitch 48: Haha. Yeah, I changed my username =) I love my new one it's a little more sophisticated (and of course, ya'll know I want to be sophisticated...) hehe. Anyway, thanks for your review!  
  
The Psychedelic Turtles: Oh yes, I am always on a sugar high when I write my chapters (I just ate a brownie and a swiss cake roll hehe)  
  
Orio Cookie: Cluck.  
  
Silver: I am glad I am in charge of a few random people having fun and laughing. A lot. ::is special::  
  
Evol Norgara: I passed my math test (the first one this 6 weeks) so yes, you're a special person and I love everyone right now! Even if they don't want to be loved! Pity piper for them!  
  
Allie: Yup.  
  
Professor Weasley: Good stuff. Good stuff. Uhhm actually, not much original stuff. I've written two poems (click on my bio and you'll see a link to my fan fiction press bio) but I don't pretend to be a poet. Oh yes, and I have found my one true love, Harry Potter. And thank you!  
  
Kaleigh: Speaking of Catholicism, lent is starting. And if anyone cares, I am Catholic.  
  
Crystal Queen: Spiked donuts? Hmph.  
  
"Nobody really cares if you're miserable so you might as well be happy."- Cynthia Nelms  
  
Isn't that quote just so true? Yes, my wise words for the day.  
  
All reviews are GREATLY appreciated.  
  
~*Been There Done That*~  
  
9:04 PM:  
  
Wassup Homie?  
  
I am so bored.  
  
Do you know that I ate enough food at dinner to supply a small island with food for a year?  
  
Yes.  
  
You know, I need to go on a diet.  
  
Seriously.  
  
All this food!  
  
I heard this girl say, "So many boys so little time."  
  
And I'm here thinking, "So much food so little time!"  
  
9:14 PM:  
  
Have veto-ed plans of diet. Think this is stupid and superficial.  
  
Am already too gorgeous.  
  
Must let others catch up.  
  
They are lowly mortals.  
  
10 PM:  
  
Good things about me:  
  
Am prettier than Charlotte Jenkins but then again she's the nine hundred pound, crooked nose, tiny ear girl from Antarctica isn't she? Pity. Am still prettier than her.  
  
I snog my boyfriend all the time! Even though at the moment he is talking to some veela girl. Oh well. Am prettier than veela anyways. Well, am not prettier than veela but self-thinks that self is prettier.  
  
There.  
  
Is enough.  
  
Sleep is yummy.  
  
7:13 AM:  
  
It must be cursed.  
  
7  
  
1  
  
3  
  
All odd numbers! Oh yeah, does this mean I will have a bad day?  
  
8:34 AM:  
  
Oh goody goody gumdrops! I am having the best day of my bloody life!  
  
This is like heaven on earth, but better.  
  
Well starting off, there were a dozen donuts on my breakfast plate.  
  
This, is like, awesome.  
  
They are delicious.  
  
Sprinkled one's. Chocolate one's. Jelly filling. Cinnamon rolls. Ect, ect.  
  
Apparently my admirer gave them to me.  
  
Because well, let's face it, I am beautiful and incapable of gaining weight.  
  
9:12 AM:  
  
Good day wrecked.  
  
Am one pound heavier than before breakfast.  
  
Maybe that veela wanted me to gain weight so she could be prettier and skinnier than I am?  
  
Nah.  
  
Will always be prettier/skinnier than little artificial moron.  
  
10:56 AM:  
  
I'm not superficial am I?  
  
Oh wait, mascara smeared. Be right back.  
  
11:10 AM:  
  
Hmm. Classes are going well so far, I think.  
  
Flitwick was being creepy though, he was all looking over my charm's homework and going, "Oooh very pretty."  
  
I mean, I know I used purple ink, but still! Pretty?  
  
Oh whatever.  
  
Will get over it.  
  
Flitwick is pretty.  
  
12:13 AM:  
  
LUNCH! Pah-tay.  
  
Fruit punch!  
  
1:08 PM:  
  
Who would've guessed you could get drunk off of fruit punch?  
  
S  
  
P  
  
I  
  
K  
  
E  
  
D  
  
Hehe, I'm funny.  
  
Funny and drunk!  
  
Lah-tee-tah.  
  
That spiked punch was oddly delicious.  
  
Well accidentally leave out note saying 'we loved spiked punch' so people will get the clue to spike it some more soon.  
  
Veela girl was laughing at me going, "She's as drunk as a pig!"  
  
Wait, can pigs get drunk? Well, maybe if they were given spiked punch-  
  
And second, was that an inadvertent message that I am, indeed, a pig?  
  
I had my suspicions. Mum and Dad always say I came from some 'different species' perhaps this species is pig?  
  
Oh dear.  
  
I am deeply offended now.  
  
Cause at breakfast people were eating bacon.  
  
Wait, I was eating bacon too!  
  
Oh dear! Is this like they were eating my family/ancestors/ect?  
  
Bacon.  
  
And I like eating bacon too.  
  
Does this make me a cannibal? Sense I'd be eating my 'own' species?  
  
Well not go into it.  
  
4:14 PM:  
  
Am still drunk.  
  
I have a very 'lovely' floating sensation.  
  
Like, flying, but with more throwing up in it.  
  
4:19 PM:  
  
Wait, I see Buddha!  
  
Oooooh!!!  
  
4:34 PM:  
  
Sorry, was just a hallucination. Am disappointed. I was looking forward to meeting Buddha. Will see about this next time.  
  
4:56 PM:  
  
Wait, this seems more like drugs than like spiked punch-  
  
Oh dear!  
  
What did they slip into my drink?  
  
Oh, bloody heck who really cares? It is fun and tasted yummy either way.  
  
Well recommend this.  
  
Yes, certainly.  
  
Oh dear.  
  
~*~*~*~*~  
  
~*~*~*~*~ 


	8. The Whacked Up Chappy, Pans, and Reezo

My Note: We all need laughter in times of, well, bad things. War is upon us (and it stinks so bad!) and I think we all need something to make us laugh. At least for a while.  
  
Thanks to:  
  
ArwenUndomiel: Not at first, but now I know who you are!  
  
Dana: Hogwarts Hangover...brilliance. Fanfiction.net can be a pill sometimes what can I say?  
  
Heather: Silly goose, all veelas are evil.  
  
Melli: 'Course I'm a girl! Homework is terrible! I've got some tonight!  
  
Mira: It 'still' amazes me that people find me funny; it almost makes me go into a hyperventilating attack, because I just so, am not, funny.  
  
Lord of the snitch 48: Buddha Pride!  
  
Evol Norgara: Yup there aren't many other ways to spell Fat Tuesday and Ash Wednesday. Lol. I haven't eaten candy since Ash Wednesday! Tis hard!  
  
Riposte: This story is, NEVERENDING!  
  
The Psychedelic Turtles: Everyone seemed to love the 'spiked' theme of chappy seven.  
  
Orio Cookie. EVERYONE gets drunk.  
  
Hannirose: BDA (Butterbeer Drinkers Anonymous) hmm? Is that what you want? I got a kick out of that.  
  
Somethings in the basement: Why, thank you!  
  
Lemon the kitty: Buddha IS cool.  
  
Crystal Queen: I know! I feel absolutely terrible for not updating sooner.  
  
Silver: I enjoyed that part myself.  
  
I am amazed by these reviews. SOO amazed. I love you all! Peace in the Middle East!  
~*~*~*Been There Done That*~*~*~  
  
5:15 PM:  
  
So I'm sitting on a bench, and veela and MY boyfriend start walking towards me. The agony! The horror! The little dumbo.  
  
I come to find out her name is "Reezo." What sort of name is Reezo? Bloody heck get yourself a halfway decent name. I brought this up to her.  
  
"What sort of name is Reezo?" I asked her and she started crying and said, "It was my great great grandma's name she passed away before I was born."  
  
And then I said, "Are you crying because your name is Reezo or because your Grandma died?"  
  
Which, I have to admit was a bit unsympathetic. But so was Reezo's trying to kill me with an overdose of spiked punch and donuts.  
  
But of course George loves me more than he could ever love Reezo anyways-  
  
After all, I don't look 'perfect'-  
  
Wait, wouldn't he want someone perfect looking?  
  
Of course not?  
  
My rather large ears just add on to my beauty!  
  
Right?  
  
Someone assure me.  
  
And then there's my feet-  
  
Won't get into it.  
  
Well, at least I'm prettier than Scarlet Traies. Although she did dislocate her nose, is over nine hundred pounds and wears goopy glitter eyeliner.  
  
Wait, I wear goopy glitter eyeliner. I have a funny shaped nose. And, if I keep eating like I'm eating now, I could eventually weigh nine hundred pounds.  
  
What an evil world we live in.  
  
5:33 PM:  
  
Diet? Maybe?  
  
How about I stop eating cookies?  
  
How terrible would that be though! Think about it, no yummy cookies. And then, people would say, "Why can't you try my cookie?"  
  
And you'd say, "Diet."  
  
And they'd say, "Puh-leaze. You are far too gorgeous and skinny for that sort of thing."  
  
And you'd say, "I know. Now pass me that cookie or I'll hit you with my pan."  
  
5:43 PM:  
  
Lah-tee-dah.  
  
Alicia is, incredibly dumb. She was telling me today that she 'loves everyone.'  
  
And I said, "Even the professors?" And she goes, "No, I hate them."  
  
Yeah, I'm sure she loves EVERYONE. Uhuh.  
  
6:11 PM:  
  
BACON BITS!  
  
CHEDAR BITS!  
  
9:19 PM:  
  
D'you know Alicia is still going out with Marcus. Listen to this direct quote from the banshee.  
  
"You know, Kates, I'll marry Marcus, of course, the blazing hottie. We'll get married; my parents will fall in love with him, but EW, not as much as I've fallen in love with him of course. Wouldn't it be wrong if my parents fell in love with him? Totally. I'll work at the donut store near our cottage, and he'll work as a chimney sweep, then we'll have children. Smoochies and Drackie will be our children. Isn't it adorable?"  
  
She really is 'that' mentally insane.  
  
7:45 AM:  
  
Another beautiful day in captivity. As the anarchists would call it.  
  
I'm not an anarchist, really. But c'mon now they're serving us prisoner food here!  
  
Think about it.  
  
Frozen peas. Chicken legs. Or was that the food I found in the dumpster?  
  
Wait.  
  
8:12 AM:  
  
I am going au' natural today!  
  
No makeup. At all.  
  
Because makeup takes away from the internal value and just brings external attention.  
  
All I put on was some lip-gloss, mascara, eyeliner, blush, eye shadow, and a bit of foundation! That's it!  
  
And I curled my eyelashes.  
  
Goodbye external-ness.  
  
8:30 AM:  
  
Am getting no attention for makeup. Self is gorgeous. But under- appreciated. I wonder if this was how Napoleon felt. Poor short guy on big horse. Napoleon was gorgeous, ahhh and under-appreciated. However, he was worshipped in some places.  
  
Am I worshipped in some place?  
  
One can only hope.  
  
12 PM:  
  
Am working on clay model of self, as 'statue' or such. Self looks very ugly with blue clay head and big flesh coloured clay ears.  
  
And I won't even begin to talk about my feet.  
  
They're all lumpy and big.  
  
And then there's my purple stomach.  
  
It's evil, I'm telling you.  
  
No wonder Napoleon committed suicide he had to look at all of those terrible pictures/statues of himself!  
  
Wait, Napolean didn't kill himself. But he would, if he could, I'm sure.  
  
1:09 PM:  
  
Veela girl. Is just plain obnoxious.  
  
She needs to get her hands off of my man  
  
Because I can hit her with a pan.  
  
Rhyming words is fun. And educational. 


	9. Ugly Donkey, Intestine, and Friends Fore...

Authors Note: Oh my gosh I am so sorry you guys'! It's been ages, and I feel terrible (check out my bio, you should see how many new fics I've written, the answer is awing) but anyway! I love you all! So sorry!  
  
Lord of the snitch48: No problemo! Sorry I haven't updated in so long! Ah, Reezo, everyone had such a problem spelling that in their reviews.  
  
Elven Dagger: Does it really? I'm not sure it's good enough to be Bridget Jones!  
  
OrioCookie: Oooh rum. Living on the wild side. Eh?  
  
KrazyReader: No! I am so not funny! I'm just not.  
  
Melli: Thanks bunches. You can relate to Katie? I'm glad I'm making her "decently" 3D.  
  
Mrs. Wood Felton: Alicia is a psycho maniac who needs to be put in an insane asylum.  
  
Evol Norgara: Haha! Agreed. Veelas are like my idea of "popular, preppy people" so they will be used in terrible "lights" throughout my fic. Enjoy the preppy bashing cause you know I will!  
  
Professor Weasley: Thanks =)  
  
The Psychedelic Turtles: Ah, the pan thing, you know I enjoyed that a bit myself.  
  
Lemon the kitty: How in the world do I respond to that?  
  
Silver: Will you flip when I update this time?  
  
Arwen Undomiel: Of course I know who you are!  
  
Love you all!  
  
~*Been There Done That*~  
1:13 PM:  
  
Veela girl is sitting next to me. At lunch. Right now. Merlin, who knew veelas could be so ugly? Honestly!  
  
All right, fine I'm being bitter.  
  
I'm the ugly one.  
  
And I must lick the dirt off her shoes.  
  
Better?  
  
I think so.  
  
Cordon bleu is rather lovely tasting. That is if you like things that taste like pig intestine. Ah well, I do!  
  
Veela girl isn't eating the cordon bleu (filthy little psycho!) I guess it'll make her "fat". Must remember to leave donuts in her dorm so she will get fat.  
  
And then I will be considered skinny!  
  
What a fantastic plan Katie!  
  
4:31 PM:  
  
In history of magic.  
  
So boring.  
  
Going to die.  
  
No, if only it could be that simple.  
  
"Now class," professor Binns drones on, "remember. What sort of jelly did Godric Gryffindor like the best?"  
  
"Lemon," we all say.  
  
Nap time!  
  
5:01 PM:  
  
You know, I was thinking. If I were gorgeous (like a veela) then I wouldn't have time to build up my personality filled with love and compassion. Thus, everyone would say "Oh you're so beautiful! And yet you have the personality of a flobber worm!" Now they just say:  
  
"Oh you're so ugly! And yet you have the personality of Mother Theresa!" Merlin, I love that lady.  
  
Talk about love and kindness. And compassion.  
  
I hate Reezo. With a burning passion.  
  
I saw her after class and she said to me, "lah-tee, I like your book bag." Since when did I become lahtey? I'm guessing lahtey means "ugly donkey." Lovely.  
  
And how could she like my book bag? It's brown leather.  
  
What a moron.  
  
Can't she just jump off a cliff?  
  
6:34 PM:  
  
My makeup looks so well done!  
  
Alicia looked at me and said, "Hey, Katie, you don't actually look like you're vying for a seat at the popular table today."  
  
Why thank you.  
  
But forgive me:  
  
I am still vying.  
  
7:11 PM:  
  
I brought this "handy dandy" journal down to dinner with me.  
  
We're eating strained peas.  
  
And macaroni and cheese. I don't know if I like it.  
  
It's a tad -cheesy- by cheesy I mean terrible. And by terrible I mean lovely. And by lovely I mean, well-  
  
Nevermind.  
  
Too complex for your small minds.  
  
Everyone at the table is giving me the evil eye, what'd I do now? Steal their macaroni and cheese? Laugh too loud? Breathe too hard?  
  
8:17 PM:  
  
I wonder if Godric Gryffindor ever felt like everyone was looking at him?  
  
He probably did, poor Godric.  
  
But I bet they were all admiring how gorgeous he is.  
  
Ah.  
  
8:20 PM:  
  
Kicked a random first years "rolly book bag" haha. They went toppling down the stairs in a twisted heap one of them was actually screaming "Mummy! Mummy!"  
  
And then I heard a very vague: "Dumbledore! Dumbledore!"  
  
And then, in succession: "Lemon drop! Lemon Drop!"  
  
The first years have serious problems these days.  
  
One being the fact that they are stupid. Incredibly stupid.  
  
11:04 PM:  
  
It's getting late!  
  
That takes the cake!  
  
I want to go to the lake!  
  
Rhyming words is fun! Good stuff.  
  
8:45 PM:  
  
Alicia is officially part of the popular group.  
  
Oh dearie it's sad.  
  
Reezo goes in this fake tone, "Hey, Alicia you wanna come sit with us?"  
  
And Alicia nods like a scared little goat and DITCHES me (Hey we were having a nice conversation about cow intestine! How dare she leave our fun- ness for Reezo)  
  
So, I was alone.  
  
Well, not really, I was sitting by Neville.  
  
Neville started talking about "herbs" in a way that did not seem Herbology- like. Honestly. I was halfway thinking that kid was high or something.  
  
Must investigate.  
  
"Like I love your makeup!" Reezo exclaims to the filthy traitor (IE: Clown Alicia)  
  
"My other best friend didn't say that," she sniffed, "she thought it was ugly."  
  
Reezo gave her a sympathetic smile, "Aww! I wouldn't sit with her. Ever. Again," and then she looked me straight in the eyes.  
  
Alicia nodded.  
  
Oh it was THAT sad.  
  
11:25 AM:  
  
Potions. Snape is so very odd.  
  
The way he stirs his cauldron is just:  
  
Oh so sexy.  
  
And yes, he is a fifty-year-old man. And yes, he never washes his hair. And yes, he hates me. And yes-  
  
AND NO!  
  
What am I bleedin' thinking of? Alicia was always here to keep me sane. I know, imagine that.  
  
And now I deserve to be thrown in an "institution" (the kind with the padded walls) screaming, "My fry-end is gone! My fry-end is gone! Can I have some cow intestine?"  
  
Oh dear. Look at the things I've been saying lately  
  
12:13 PM:  
  
My nose looks even bigger today!  
  
I wonder if one of them slipped me a "nose grower" potion. It's sticking out to the other end of CHINA.  
  
And China is gigantic.  
  
And so is my nose.  
  
12:34 PM:  
  
Caught Alicia and Marcus snogging in the broom closet. That was lovely. Alicia was HALF OUT of the broom closet, but that didn't matter. Marcus was camouflaged as one of the brooms.  
  
"You two children," I said, "need to find better snogging places. I suggest the east wing..."  
  
And then Alicia looked at me and said, "Don't tell me what to do. Ever again."  
  
And promptly began snogging Marcus again.  
  
"Fine! Fine! You want to play that game, do you? Well, I'll have Dumbledore know about this little 'place'!"  
  
Heh. Go me.  
  
5:13 PM:  
  
One is the loneliest number...  
  
Ah well, I've got my ears. And they count as three people.  
  
Even though there are only two ears.  
  
Who cares about technicalities?  
  
Not me! AH AH! Idea idea. Forgive me, I will be right back.  
  
6:45 PM:  
  
I got my friend back! And it wasn't even THAT hard.  
  
"Alicia," I said, "wanna come get a donut with me?"  
  
It's common-known fact Alicia loves donuts. She gave me a cold look, "No."  
  
"'Licia, come on-" I paused poignantly "a chocolate donut."  
  
She squealed "I'm in, I've just got to tell Reezo, she'll worry if I'm gone, you know how friends do-"  
  
"No!" I screamed as I grabbed her arm and pulled her ALL THE WAY to the kitchens kicking and screaming and calling me foul names such as "ugly donkey" nice friend, I know.  
  
When we got there I ordered some "donuts" from Doby.  
  
"Coming right up, Miss." He said.  
  
"Listen-" I told Alicia who so totally looked like her mind was on broom closets and Marcus "-I've been all alone for a bleedin' day as you go over there and sit with the 'army' (our name for popular people) what's with that?"  
  
"Kates, I just want them to like me."  
  
"Oh," I said, "We don't need them! Kay? We'll be an army of two! We shall conquer all!"  
  
Alicia grinned, "Yeah. Sorry, me leaving you for Reezo was pretty low."  
  
"Friends?" I grinned.  
  
"Friends." She grinned back.  
  
"Wanna continue our conversation about cow intestine?" I said, as I took a bite of chocolate donut.  
  
"Nah, how 'bout we talk about how stupid Reezo is." Alicia said, "You know, she's so fake. You're so much cooler, Katie."  
  
And the funny thing is, I'm not. Except my best friend thinks I am. And I think she is too. 


	10. And So It Starts! Oliver, Peanut Butter...

Authors Note: It's been a while! And it's 11:37 PM and I'm so darn bored that I'm like 'I ought to update' so here are! The reviews were magnificent for last chapter. This chapter is dramatic, and I don't really like it, I just needed something to start happening. So here we are. I don't blame you if you don't like it. I made this chapter (at least the end) super simple so don't be like "That's unrealistic!" Because I agree, it is. But I'm not going to drag it out and make it all long. Oh yes and remember the dream, kay? Cause it's going to play a big part in later/ending chapters. My idea for the ending of this chappy was also very spontaneous. I just want to mix things up a bit and bring back the 'Oliver' idea.  
  
I adore Sprite.  
  
Hannirose: Was it funny, then?  
  
KrazyReader: I am so not funny! Why does everyone think that? The whole table was giving Katie the evil eye because she is very unpopular and they are very popular. Aye. Hierarchy at its best.  
  
Dagger: I will totally inform you whenever I update  
  
Somewhere-I-Belong: Friendship DOES rule.  
  
Dana: Snape is darn lovely.  
  
Carolyn: I'm always writing brilliant masterpieces. Heh. Heh. Blatant Self-Promotion: Check out my bio tons of angst-y or fluffy new one-shots. Enjoy. Sorry about last chappy not being as great (in your opinion) but hey, I liked it!  
  
The Psychedelic Turtles: Ah. I love Neville.  
  
Professor Weasley: Thanks bunches.  
  
Evol Norgara: Godric=Cherry jello? Hm. (ponders this)  
  
Lemon the Kitty: I hope this has been quicker.  
  
Mrs.Wood-Felton: Reviewers can be evil (honestly, I've seen it) I get so many ditsy people who review me going: "dudettez I 'uv your ficcccccc teeheeeeeez updatez. Kay? And harry shud get together with farmer hermione!" Yeah. I agree.  
  
OrioCookie: Haha. That's all I have to say.  
  
I love you all! Thanks so much (as always) for your participation.  
  
Enjoy!  
  
About Oliver: I adore him as well (I've gotten heavy flaming {to an extent} about how he is not mentioned enough.) I agree. Read this chapter and if you'll an Oliver fan, then you'll love me.  
  
~*Been There Done That*~  
  
7 AM:  
  
Am friends again with Miss "psycho knickers."  
  
Fine. I admit it. I missed her.  
  
A bit.  
  
Just a bit.  
  
She's still a raving loony though.  
  
"I'm sorry," she told me, "kates. You know how I can get, the therapist said that I am driven by the need/want for popularity. Forgive me!" and then she threw herself down at my knees.  
  
Making my way down to breakfast.  
  
7:32 AM:  
  
Eating toast. Soggy toast.  
  
George swears that toast dipped in chocolate milk is delicious. I'm not so sure.  
  
It's sort of spongy.  
  
But not in an entirely bad sort of way.  
  
Reezo is giving me a bad look.  
  
Like, '-we want to bring your friend to the dark side with us (IE popularity) let her go! Let her come with us, we shall give her hotdogs and not deprive her of those like you have done! You're a bad friend-'  
  
Yeah. Bloody Right.  
  
I don't think it's natural to think people are 'trying' to talk to you when in reality they hate you.  
  
Hm. Shall ponder this on my way to history of magic.  
  
8:56 AM:  
  
Professor Binns is crazy! Someone check him into Saint Mungos! I bet he'll go on a killing spree sometime soon-  
  
Or he'll simply give out "happy pills" and talk about love and peace. Or something else like that.  
  
He has discovered a new fascination with quill and parchment.  
  
"Look! When I use this quill and write on this yellowed-paper you see-" shocker "-words!"  
  
What an odd one.  
  
Oh yes, and then he talked to us about his love life. More disturbing then quill/parchment talk.  
  
"Yes," he told us, "I did have an-"LARGE PAUSE "affair, I mean marriage partner. Who, mind you, I was entirely faithful to!"  
  
And then he goes, "And you should've seen where we snogged when we were here! Public displays of affection were not allowed so we went into broom closets-" shocker we still do that now "-so Eloise and I had some fun times in those. Totally unacceptable, of course, but you know how it is-"  
  
The boys whooped and he goes:  
  
"Yes. She was very hot."  
  
Ew!  
  
10:11 AM:  
  
Still disturbed about Binn's.  
  
Very disturbed.  
  
Am pondering to never touch a closet or broom now. After all.ew  
  
Eloise and Binns.  
  
Ew.  
  
In Potions.  
  
When Snape is stirring that cauldron-  
  
OOOH.  
  
Anyway. Enough of that.  
  
11:30 AM:  
  
Had a dream about Oliver and I. During Potions (yes I sleep during Potions, so sue me)  
  
We were on a beach. Like Hawaii or something and we were sitting in lounge chairs watching out children (they were so gorgeous!) play in the waves.  
  
Our son, James, and our daughter, Brooklyn. She was such a Daddy's girl. Anyway-  
  
It was so perfect and then he kissed me and said:  
  
"Hey, love, want something to drink? I'm going to go back to the cabin for a few."  
  
And I kissed him with my perfect candy lips and said: "I'm fine, sweetie."  
  
"Yes," he said in an entirely suggestive sort of way "I know you're fine."  
  
Yeah. That definitely is terrible.  
  
The worst part is what a fairytale it all was.  
  
Darn. Why'd I have to wake up?  
  
I can just imagine George and I.  
  
On a beach.  
  
He'd say "Yo, babe, ya want a fizzy drink?" How...romantic  
  
And our children would be ragamuffins.  
  
Lovely.  
  
And we'd be on the DOLE (Brit form of welfare)  
  
And we'd live in a box.  
  
Yeah. Dare to dream. Definitely.  
  
12 PM:  
  
Lunch. Fun.  
  
Threw butter at Reezo for no apparent reason.  
  
Although I'm sure I was perfectly justified, of course. I always am.  
  
She looked at me, and sputtered (ha! Get it? She had butter in her mouth) and she said:  
  
"Sweetie, we all know you're jealous of my good looks. Who wouldn't be?"  
  
Of course, she had a point there, "But we all know that you can never be gorgeous so you ought to just get used to it. And we can all tell you're trying to hard for that Oliver boy, well, hun jealousy ain't pretty."  
  
Ouch. That stung. Right here. In the heart.  
  
I think I'll just go crawl up in a corner-  
  
AND DIE.  
  
I would've responded but Alicia said: "Even if you tried, Reezo, you could never be half as pretty as Kates! You're so unnatural, it's so forced! And, I think it's really you who's been gunning for Oliver. Don't think I haven't seen," she said and then promptly sat down.  
  
Reezo-looked scandalized.  
  
Standing OVATION for Alicia!  
  
And I whispered, "Saw what?"  
  
And she laughed, this evil little laugh and said: "Nothing. Just wanted to worry her a bit."  
  
Ha.  
  
4:30 PM:  
  
Caught Neville looking at the Fat Lady in a way that suggested that:  
  
She wasn't fat  
  
He thought she was lovely  
  
He wanted to go snog her in a broom closet.  
  
Suspicions were confirmed when he said:  
  
"Hey, Mathilda," that's her name?  
  
"can't you move your lovely gold frame to an ermmmm closet?"  
  
She just laughed, winked at me and whispered (('I never got the young whippersnappers back then and look at me now! A total boy magnet!")) I just laughed. Sort of.  
  
Figured out that Fat Lady is not as modest as first thought of.  
  
Said password "Lovin' Longbottom."  
  
Lovely.  
  
6:43 PM:  
  
Ran into Oliver.  
  
He flashed me one of those smiles-  
  
And I just giggled.  
  
"Hi-" I said "So you know the way to the girl's loo?"  
  
Oh dear. Sound educated there, Katie. You go girl.  
  
"The girl's loo?" he asked "Sorry, haven't been there."  
  
Wow. Typical answer.  
  
"Ahhh-" the dream was coming back to me.  
  
"So-"  
  
"I'm fine, sweetie."  
  
OH MY BLOODY MERLIN! I HAD JUST QUOTED WHAT I SAID IN THE DREAM! THAT WAS SO WRONG!  
  
Flirting with the hot boy. What WAS I thinking?  
  
"Yes," he said in an entirely suggestive sort of way "I know you're fine." ANOTHER QUOTE FROM THE DREAM!  
  
He was flirting with the ugly girl. What WAS he thinking?  
  
7:32 PM:  
  
I love cookies, I was thinking of that.  
  
Warm, hot, fresh from the oven cookies. Especially when Dobby makes them.  
  
"Here. Miss." He told me and put a plate in front of me.  
  
I sort of banged my head down upon the bar.  
  
"What iz the matter, miss?" he asked. Like he cared. Pretty compassionate for a little fellow.  
  
"It's just, this feeling-" I remember telling him.  
  
"A feeling?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah. I don't think I should be with George."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I think I should be with someone else."  
  
"Oh," he said softly.  
  
"What do you think?"  
  
"I think," he said in a 'I'm perfecting my English' sort of way "that you do what Miss wants to do."  
  
Oh great. I'm telling my woes to a house elf. Funny. And he has better advice then Alicia  
  
I don't know why I went on prattling to him, I just knew I had to talk to him-  
  
Talk to him about a thought that had been surfacing in my mind for a while.  
  
Yes, I'm going to do it! And no one can stop me!  
  
5:21 PM:  
  
Wow.  
  
I just broke up with George.  
  
Truth be told, we haven't talked lately and we haven't really been very Girlfriend/Boyfriend like lately (we haven't held hands or talked or anything, really) So I blamed it on that.  
  
But afterwards (after I was being all dramatic and loud and 'I love you I'm just not IN love with you!' And I swear Alicia was laughing her bloody head off and spitting out gulps of water) George started dipping his toast in chocolate milk and saying:  
  
"It's okay, sweets, still the best of friends, right?"  
  
"Right. Always and forever."  
  
It's all going to be okay.  
  
8:52 PM:  
  
He passed me, on the way to the drinking fountain (what's with these little impromptu meeting sessions?) and he goes:  
  
"Hey, Kates, I heard about George."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"How're you?"  
  
"I'm fine."  
  
"Well, I was wondering-"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
"I was wondering if you could make me a peanut butter sandwich," he said.  
  
I turned scarlet.  
  
"Erm. Yes. No. I mean, maybe. But first, Oliver. Do you think maybe we could see what it'd be like to snog a bit?"  
  
He looked at me in this weird sort of way.  
  
"I mean, go out! Go out, that's it!"  
  
"You had the dream, didn't you?" he asked.  
  
"The dream?"  
  
Oh my Merlin. It's all coming back to me now.  
  
"Yes! The dream, wow, you had it too?"  
  
"Yeah, quite odd," he furrowed his brows.  
  
Love!  
  
"I think we ought to try," he said, "you never know. Weirder things have happened."  
  
"Okay, okay, does that mean that we're an item now?"  
  
"Hardly. We're people."  
  
Already problems with commitment!  
  
"But we are going out?"  
  
"Seemingly so."  
  
"I'll take you up on that peanut butter sandwich offer now," I grinned.  
  
And then we linked arms and made our way to the kitchens.  
  
10:04 PM:  
  
Been There Done That. Doing It Again.  
  
~*~ 


	11. “Way more special than Oliver,” I said

Authors Note: Hey all! Just finished Order of the Phoenix yesterday. Go me. It was intense. I was bawling. 'Nuff said.  
  
About this chapter: It isn't fantastic or anything, or very funny but I tried to add in small bits of humor. It's pretty long (or so I think) so just enjoy, I needed to update and for the most part I'm happy with this chapter, even though it is a bit long-winded. It's sort of dramatic but I assure you the next chapter will be good and silly =) So bear with me here. I felt like doing what I did in this chapter, so I went ahead and did it. Enjoy. And please find the humor, it's in there!  
  
Extra note: I had SOOO much fun with the speech between Melanie and Katie (but mainly Katie) and it was terribly fun to write, even with the drama bits in there.  
  
*  
  
Hannirose: It would've been an amazing ending (and to tell you the truth, I did contemplate that) but it isn't its time yet.  
  
Raindrops: Lol =) thanks for your review.  
  
Dagger: It was unexpected. I needed something to spice it up.  
  
Lemon the kitty: You just love Binn's, don't you? So sue me! I do too.  
  
Xodixiegurlox: Honestly, I'd love a bit of Katie/Bran going on (it'd be gorgeous and lovely) but I want to keep up the whole friendship without interruptions.  
  
Carolyn: Oliver had, for the most part, the same dream as Katie had.  
  
Professor Weasley: Awww! I cheered you up? You're making me feel good now, =) Lol. I'm glad.  
  
Evol Norgara: Neville rocks. I adore Neville.  
  
Mrs. Wood Felton: Yeah, it was random!  
  
Allie-Marina: The "stunt" I pulled last chapter should not be analyzed! It's psycho and bizarre and I love it.  
  
Krazy Reader: Thanks loads.  
  
I love you all! Enjoy this chapter!  
  
~*Been There Done That*~  
  
7 AM:  
  
It's early you know. But I love when it's early because I get to start off "another" wonderful day with Oliver, and my life is worth living! It serves promise and love and it beats anyone else's life! Except for rich people's.  
  
I want to be rich.  
  
Maybe Oliver will be rich and I can mooch off of that.  
  
It could happen.  
  
Anything could happen now that I have my Oliver!  
  
The sun is out and it is clear and gorgeous. The rays shine upon my face and I'm just in awe.  
  
Well, I mean sure it's cloudy and raining and the sun is hiding from my hideous morning face but that isn't the point.  
  
Not really.  
  
Going to breakfast.  
  
7:43 AM:  
  
I'm at breakfast! Sitting next to Bran who has just caught wind of the fact that I'm going out with Oliver.  
  
He isn't happy.  
  
Actually, he's elated.  
  
"I knew we'd marry you off someday, old gal."  
  
Thanks. Thanks a bloody lot.  
  
Actually, although it sounds terrible and arrogant and everything else I wanted him to be jealous. Terribly jealous. Not because he isn't Oliver but because Oliver will be spending a lot of time with me now, and Bran and I won't get to spend as much "friend time" together. But he isn't jealous.  
  
Fine.  
  
Oliver was attempting to hold my hand WHILE we attempted to eat BREAKFAST. How difficult is that? It's SO hard. So I reach over for the syrup and it spills all over his white, crisp, collared shirt.  
  
And he still doesn't let go of my hand as it fills with nasty syrup.  
  
Lovely.  
  
And I thought I'D be the clingy one.  
  
8:03 AM:  
  
Oliver walked me to History of Magic today.  
  
He's lovely, it's weird talking to him though, like unnatural.  
  
"Erm. So. Yeah. How are you? Did you sleep well?" He actually asked me that.  
  
"I'm fine. I slept fine," was my response. It was a bit mechanical though.  
  
9:51 AM:  
  
In History of Magic. Professor Binns is so weird.  
  
Even weirder than before.  
  
If that's even humanly possible.  
  
Which I doubt it is.  
  
But you never know.  
  
Stranger things have happened.  
  
"Goblin revolts are very interesting. Very interesting indeed. In fact, I love Goblins. With a burning passion. I hope to snog one before I die."  
  
We, of course, failed to mention the fact that he's already dead.  
  
He's probably trying to live vicariously through me and make me snog a Goblin.  
  
Well, if the pay was good. . .  
  
12:21 PM:  
  
Lunch!  
  
Ham and cheese sandwiches, I'm getting excited now.  
  
Oliver's talking excitedly to Bran.  
  
Something about "yeah she is something special", that's what Bran was saying.  
  
And then Oliver nodded, "I'll take good care of her, Bran."  
  
Bran gave him a warning look and said, "You better, Oliver. Because if you don't, its your head on the chopping block."  
  
The scary thing is, I think he meant it.  
  
Oliver has a fascination with olives. Odd. He puts them on his fingers and does a puppet show, but it's an olive show.  
  
"See the green in this olive? Very ripe."  
  
Uhuh.  
  
I see that. And I don't even care.  
  
But I should, shouldn't I? I mean he IS my boyfriend after all.  
  
So I've taken to calling him Olive.  
  
It's short.  
  
And it has a "hidden symbol" ((I hear lovers' always have these hidden symbols)) and he goes, "Well, you'll need a name too then."  
  
"I have a name, Katie, Katie Belle."  
  
He rolled his eyes, "A special name."  
  
I paused in mid-bite of ham sandwich, "Go on then, what's your idea."  
  
"Hammy," he said, "you like ham sandwiches."  
  
I was about ready to die.  
  
If this is romance then somebody kill me.  
  
"Hammy? But, doll, come on now. Hammy? I loathe these sandwiches, I curse their guts, I do not like them, I am not happy."  
  
He looked at me and said, "I'm glad you're happy."  
  
Talk about misinterpreting words. And I wasn't even VAGUE  
  
Not even sort of.  
  
Bran was rolling his eyes and looking as though he was about ready to crack up, he looked at me and mouthed "Athletes, who needs them?"  
  
And I met his eyes and grinned, "Me."  
  
2:45 PM:  
  
In between our break I saw Bran standing near the water fountain, all alone. Without Melanie. He looked pretty sad, so I ran over to him (thankfully Olive was away)  
  
"Hey, mate," I addressed him casually, "why the sad face? You have a gorgeous smile again, come on, give me one."  
  
He choked out, "Melanie and I broke up." His voice was hard and cold and oddly vulnerable. As though the words hurt and they overpowered.  
  
"Oh," what does one say in situations like these?  
  
I love Bran. Sometimes I think he's my soul. He's my history; he's like blood almost. And you can't deny blood.  
  
"She accused me of liking you," he said it like 'you' made him almost hurl, "and we hadn't been spending as much time together anymore, you know, Mel and I."  
  
I ushered him back towards Gryffindor common room and he didn't even protest, even though we'd be ditching afternoon lessons.  
  
He was a wreck. And that was scary, seeing Bran so not put together, and seeing him scared and vulnerable like a little boy. He's always been my rock, you see. These past years, he's been my strong place. And to see the strongest of the strong holding you with such a grip that was like a little boy clinging to his Mum. It was scary.  
  
"I should talk to someone else," he said, "You and Oliver, I don't want him to form accusations or anything. Go back to class, get your education," he said dismally.  
  
"Nonsense," I said, "I'm staying with you."  
  
And I did.  
  
4:13 PM:  
  
My heart's breaking for him. He's so sad, and it's partly my fault because she thought he liked me. Yeah right. Me, and Bran? That's almost laughable. For one, let's get this straight:  
  
I'm not that lucky  
  
And  
  
Bran's as good as blood. You don't marry blood anywhere but in Georgia.  
  
I'm going to have a little "talk" with her.  
  
5:56 PM:  
  
Back.  
  
Had nice chat.  
  
She needs to be thrown off the end of the earth.  
  
"So," I said, "Bran and I have been snogging behind your back. You know, I love him so much. More than apple pie, and he loves me as well. And we're going to get married and have gorgeous kids. You can come to the wedding, if you want." I can be sarcastic when I want to be.  
  
"I knew it!" She cried out!  
  
Talk about naïve Gryffindors.  
  
"Right. Actually, see, I have this problem. This friend of mine, he's a great guy. Any girl would be lucky to have him. He's rather good-looking, kind, strong, intelligent, anything I or anyone else would want for that matter. And he found this great girl, this girl that was just like him. When I saw them together it just made me feel so happy. Because he deserved a girl like that. They had this chemistry that just made me giggle. And today I see my bud by a water fountain almost in bloody tears. I asked him what was up and he told me. Everything.-" I paused slightly for effect, I was going to make her suffer.  
  
"Everything?" she croaked.  
  
"Yes. No interrupting. So my friend, a friend I've known forever, told me that this great girl thought that he had liked me. Yeah right. Me? Somehow I doubt that. And this girl had no evidence or anything, sure they were breaking apart, but other than that she was just dying for a reason to break up with him. My friend is really hurt, he couldn't even be bothered to go to Transfiguration and that's his favorite class, although I'm sure this girl wouldn't know that. Obviously she didn't get to know him very well-"  
  
Melanie made a move like she was trying to speak and I held out my hand to stop her.  
  
"-but see, I know him very well. My heart breaks for him. And he's in his dormitory right now and he's crying because someone that he loved and cared about and hugged when she was sad and when her Daddy died, is now not there to give him the same sort of morale support. And he's crying and do you know what, his tears, they're on '-your-' hands. And you can't run away, sweetie."  
  
I finished my little "talk" with this little girl and I turned on my heel and went back up to the commons.  
  
Quite proud of myself.  
  
8:47 PM:  
  
Alicia and I are in the kitchens. We've just snitched some brownies and mugs of hot cocoa.  
  
"So you snogged him then?" She asked.  
  
"Erm. No, not really, unless you count a terribly 'innocent schoolgirl' kiss on the cheek as a snog-"  
  
"Oh."  
  
"You like him then?"  
  
"I have a feeling about him," I said not bothering to elaborate much.  
  
"A feeling?" Alicia always makes me elaborate.  
  
"Yes," I said, "Like he's the one."  
  
Most people would tell me I was being ridiculous, granted I was, but Alicia just smiled.  
  
"You do what you have to do."  
  
The rest of the time I told her about Bran, even though I didn't really want to.  
  
She smiled, "Bran's a great guy."  
  
"He's something special," I grinned.  
  
"More special than Oliver?" Alicia giggled and threw me a glance.  
  
"Way more special than Oliver," I said.  
  
And somehow I knew that I believed it.  
  
Alicia nodded half-knowingly.  
  
8 AM:  
  
I'm late for breakfast.  
  
Off to see Olive.  
  
I wonder if he'll call me 'Hammy'  
  
I hope not.  
  
8:15 AM:  
  
At breakfast.  
  
Oliver: "Hey Sleeping Beauty," he grinned.  
  
"Sleeping beauty got kissed," I reminded him.  
  
So in front of the Gryffindor breakfast table he kissed me.  
  
Right on my plum-flavored little lips.  
  
"I was kidding," I laughed.  
  
He touched my nose with the tip of his finger, "No you weren't."  
  
And I wasn't.  
  
Alicia looked over at me and mouthed: "Yeah right, you haven't snogged him before."  
  
We ate pretty quietly with toast and oatmeal I kept stealing glances at Bran who had his head down and who looked better, although his eyes were a bit puffy.  
  
"Are you alright?" Oliver asked.  
  
"Define alright," I said, driven on being halfway coy.  
  
"Decent?"  
  
"I'm fine, it's just Bran, he's sort of in a bummed out mood."  
  
"And. . ."  
  
"And I feel bad for him."  
  
"Oh. People feel bad everyday."  
  
"But 'People' aren't Bran, Olive, Bran's special." I said this in a mock conspirator voice and he looked at me and his crystal blue eyes blinked.  
  
"And I'm not special?"  
  
"You're very special, Olive," I said soothingly, "But you and Bran are different sorts of special."  
  
"Special is special."  
  
"Yes, but-"  
  
Alicia shot me an apprehensive glance and went back to her scrambled eggs.  
  
Trouble in paradise. Already? 


	12. Bad Day, Binns, and Olives Heh Heh

Authors Note: I am SO sorry! It's been forever, and I feel awful (look at my bio and you'll SEE all the new fics I've wrote...check 'em out!)  
  
Forgive me my dumplings!  
  
Hehe.  
  
So anyway:  
  
Special thanks to:  
  
Mrs. Wood Felton: I know! My baby Bran *cries* I adore him and can't stand to see him suffer so he'll be happy in this chappy.  
  
OrioCookie: Boys just don't understand at all!  
  
Professor Weasley: I was dying inside when that rocken' character died.  
  
Elven Dagger: Yuppers.  
  
Evol Norgara: I know, she's got two cuties! Alicia's just great  
  
Quicksilver Fallen: Hammy! Yup yup.  
  
KrazyReader: here it is.  
  
Caroyln: You just love Binns, huh? Well, I do too! Thanks for all your other reviews too, btw.  
  
ILoveVeggieTales: First of all, love your penname and second: thanks!  
  
Hannirose: You never know!  
  
Raindrops: It does twist and turn a lot but I'm going to try to keep this chappy pretty consistent.  
  
ENJOY!  
  
~*Been There Done That*~  
  
7 AM:  
  
Going down to breakfast in old wrinkled skirt and pumpkin juice stained shirt. Not lovely looking. Will pretend I look gorgeous although this is very difficult.  
  
At least my nose is on center...I think...  
  
Do not ask me why I am wearing old wrinkled skirt and stained shirt. I do believe it is 'anti-superficial' day in which case I will make sure my friends (and collective boyfriend) do not like me for my mere looks they must like me for...  
  
dun dun  
  
...my personality!  
  
Isn't that a stupid idea?  
  
7:30 AM:  
  
At breakfast. Eating bountiful amounts of bagels and licking up cream cheese from willow table. Hey, it's yummy, don't bash what you don't know!  
  
Alicia is going on and on about 'Marcus.'  
  
"He is my light, when there is dark. He is my magic around muggles. He is my spaghetti when there is chocolate..."  
  
She's awful.  
  
I nodded and said...well, nothing! What is there to say that?  
  
Oliver greeted me with very pleased 'Hammy!' And then 'what happened to your skirt?'  
  
"It got happy," I said.  
  
He rolled his eyes and went back to eating bacon and dipping it in maple syrup.  
  
It was very yummy I do believe.  
  
Off to Binn's!  
  
9:13 AM:  
  
At Binn's. He is quite high today I do believe. He's bustling about and saying:  
  
"I love watching hippogriff's and goblin's snogging."  
  
It's scary.  
  
And then he drank his gin and tonic and said, "dear Katie can you help me express my feelings about hippogriffs and goblin's?"  
  
I spit out my quill (don't ask me why it was in my mouth, I do not know) and then he said: "Never mind. Your skirt is wrinkled and your shirt is stained."  
  
So I stood up on my desk and said "EXCUSE ME! I AM GORGEOUS ON THE INSIDE AND IN THE OUT!"  
  
Bran clapped.  
  
Binn's said, "well no."  
  
And went back to talking.  
  
Am very angry at Binn's for "out of line" comment.  
  
10:11 AM:  
  
Brief spat in library. Books. Lots of books.  
  
With Alicia, Bran and Oliver.  
  
Oliver is saying: "Hammy look there's a book about bacon! Are you scared? heh heh."  
  
It was so very un-funny that I laughed anyway.  
  
"Olive it's a book about people squishing olives are you scared? heh heh."  
  
Alicia & Bran looked disturbed to say the least.  
  
Alicia is whining about how "I should have brought Marcus" which only reminded Bran of Melanie (don't ask me how) he looked pretty happy though.  
  
We were studying for out upcoming Charms test.  
  
Fun stuff.  
  
But it needed to be livened up.  
  
So I jumped on the table and started waltzing.  
  
The table broke.  
  
And I fell.  
  
On top of Oliver.  
  
He squealed (I am not that heavy I am not that heavy!)  
  
So I jumped off of him and said "heh heh."  
  
He clutched his stomach "ow."  
  
Alicia laughed "and you were trying to deprive ME of hotdogs. heh heh. No more bacon for Katie."  
  
I scowled.  
  
Today was not happy.  
  
11:42 AM:  
  
First I couldn't find my special pink inkwell and then I almost got killed by first years and it's just...bad  
  
Simply bad.  
  
I want to die and I want to drag Alicia along so we can have fun and get smashed in our afterlife.  
  
With no mentions of ham, diet, Oliver, or any other sad things.  
  
But yes.  
  
I shall survive!  
  
'Cause I have strong bones (Not BIG bones STRONG bones)  
  
Rawr!  
  
12:11 PM:  
  
Lunch.  
  
Sitting with the 'stupid Simons' we are called this because that's what Alicia's fat cat is called.  
  
I am annoyed.  
  
We are stupid, but we are not 'Simons.'  
  
I mean there's a lot of wrongness in that.  
  
I will never forgive this day!  
  
Feel very justified in anger and or annoyance.  
  
5:51 PM:  
  
The day got worse.  
  
For one, Oliver kissed my nose. Who kisses NOSES? That's just weird and abnormal and inhuman, I think it's like a giraffe thing or something.  
  
Then he put olives on each of his fingers and said: "Look now there's 'eleven' Olives, get it? Heh heh. Say hullo to our children."  
  
It was wrong.  
  
Then I caught Bran talking to himself in a broom closet saying something about 'snogging the broom' and 'this broom has a nice figure.'  
  
Was scared seeing friend in such awful state.  
  
Hit him over head with broom.  
  
Then Alicia went on and on about me and my supposed 'diet' stating: "If you get fat Oliver will hate you."  
  
Like I was a turkey or something that needed to be basted and fattened up. Without the 'fattening up' bit...I think I've already had enough fattening up.  
  
You see?  
  
This day is sucking the life out of the world.  
  
eh eh.  
  
Not good.  
  
8:01 PM:  
  
So it's late.  
  
And the day drags on and on and on.  
  
I'm working on my Potion's composition.  
  
All this talk of 'fungi' is scaring me. I hear Snape has fungus on his toes.  
  
It's scary.  
  
I bet his toes are real pale too.  
  
I can't blame him...he never gets to skip about  
  
Poor buddy.  
  
11:52 PM:  
  
Finally going to sleep.  
  
Has been a very annoying/obnoxious/rude day filled with trial and "tribulations" (whatever that means.)  
  
Mad at day.  
  
Going to tell 'day' off.  
  
Now I shall sleep and be happy in bliss! 


	13. Bacon Bits, Invisibility, and running DU...

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_Author's Notice: It has been such a long time! Words do not describe. I hope this new chapter of Been There Done That will make ya'll happy, I know it's short but it's something, right? __I never intended to abandon this story I just, you know, LIFE, LIFE gets in the way of everything! It's 12:10 AM, I feel like updating, I don't know why. :) I can't believe it, I'm a junior now! School is too much work. Anyway, onwards! Enjoy this! It's kinda short, sorry :( But I'll work on being better at updating this because it is my baby and it seems like a lot of people like it. Oh and sorry if anything in here contradicts things written in past chapters, I REALLY wasn't in the mood to go back and read all the previous chapters (although that too, at one point, was intended) I'm lazy. :( More coming soon._

_To all of you: THANK YOU FOR YOUR REVIEWS. YOU ROCK!_

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**3:45 PM:**

Talking to Alicia.

Does one really talk to Alicia? Today she grunted at me and expected me to understand her. I don't understand grunting. Alicia asked me, in grunts, if I'd pass her a bacon bit, so I threw the bacon bits at her and she grunted even more, and growled. And then grunted again. Somehow I think things would be much better if we all just grunted at each other.

**8:15 PM:**

Whenever Oliver calls me Hammy everyone looks at us like we're crazy. Oliver and I are a normal couple. Just because he calls me Hammy does not mean we have a messed up relationship, in fact I like Oliver calling me Hammy. Is that weird? Sometimes I think people think he is implying that I'm fat, I'm not fat, I am NORMAL. I am a NORMAL human being.

Who happens to be dating the hottest guy at school. _Imagine that._

Haha you wish you were me don't you?

**9:34 PM:**

I ran into Marcus on my way to the kitchens, I got the usual glare from Marcus. I came back and reported to Alicia.

"What did he say?"

Marcus doesn't SAY anything he just LOOKS at you like you are an ALIEN. I am not an ALIEN I am a NORMAL HUMAN BEING but no one BELIEVES ME. What is up with that? I think I'm going insane.

"He said to tell you hi, to and lay off the bacon bits."

Now Alicia was getting offended. "Marcus did not say that, Katie." She said my name like she hated me, how could she hate me? We are best friends!

"How do you know he didn't say that?" I teased holding a packet of bacon bits over her head. "How do you know? Were you there?"

Alicia got very quiet like and thoughtful, "I am invisible. I can see everything."

I burst out laughing and she didn't laugh. "Yeah right, Alicia."

"I am," Alicia said.

At that point I thought the bacon bits had drugs in them, I was seriously worried for the sake of my friend. But some drugs and bacon bits and...drugs/bacon bits TOGETHER never hurt anybody, in fact, it might be fun every now and then.

"Anyway, I don't talk to Marcus."

"Marcus is too good to talk to you."

That's the funny thing with girls, you're friends and all but all you do is insult each other and yell at each other. Ah, friendship gives me a warm fuzzy feeling in my heart.

"Whatever," I said, wanting to make her faint with my coolness, with my tone of voice, and then I continued because I like that word. "Whatever whatever whateverrrrrrrrrrr."

"Yeah whut-ever," Alicia said, filing her abnormally large nails with her big toe. Yes, that is humanly possible. "How's Oliver?"

"Oh fine, fine fine...today he gave me a rose," ha, that would show her to even TRY to ask me about my LIFE.

Actually, Oliver never does anything remotely romantic.

"Oliver isn't romantic," the Wise One said.

I glared. "He is _very_ romantic."

"How?"

Alicia asks me too many questions.

"The way he kisses me, the way we..."

"KATIE! That is inappropriate. This is SCHOOL, it is TOO LATE to be talking about such things."

"Alicia, keep your voice down, we're fine!"

"No one's looking?"

"No."

"Okay, in that case, give me all the details."

Alicia, who had just revealed her obvious sickoness, looked excited and began to nervously wring her hands, her palms sweaty. "Tell!"

Now I found this creepy too, there is a fine line between telling Alicia nothing and giving her the play-by-play on me and Arthur---I mean, Oliver snogging.

"I ain't tellin' you nothin'!"

I did not know how my language changed from normal human being to some sort of 1900's farmer man person.

"KATIE!"

"ALICIA!"

"WHAT?"

"YOU WANT A PIECE OF CHOCOLATE?"

"YEAH!"

"HERE."

"THANK YOU."

**7:00 AM:**

So I was walking on my way to the Great Hall for an inspiring breakfast of toast and oatmeal and I run into the MAN. DUMBLEDORE. I never run into The Man, he is too good to be seen socializing with us normal people. He always gives me this look...this I know what you're up to look, Missy.

"Hello, Sir Dumbledore," I said feeling very much so unimportant standing in front of him.

"You are very smart, Katie," he said nodding, so wise and so handsome standing before me.

"You are too!" I said, feeling thrilled. "You are SO SO SO SO SO SOOOOO smart!"

Dumbledore got thoughtful again, and then winced at my voice, "thank you, Katie."

"You can call me Hammy if you please." I felt like Dumbledore and I were ready to bring our relationship to a personal one, one in which he could call me my given name. Hammy.

He just looked at me, adjusted his glasses and said, "have you got any oatmeal so far this morning?"

"On my way!" I said: "Shall we?" I motioned to the Great Hall and started following him, he almost ran, I swear, no one's ever seen Dumbledore run but he was RUNNING for that oatmeal...or just running away from me.

I enjoyed today's oatmeal. When I ate it all I could think about was Dumbledore. Dumbledore running. So graceful, so lovely, so...

**2:20 PM:**

I can't believe it's only Tuesday.


End file.
